Sometimes I think about being really famous. Like some internet how-to-person. Or some crafty person with a business. Or an author. Or I am in an accident one day, and the next day I wake up and I can sing really well. But mostly these days I dream about being able to sleep. (Before you hastily type your well-meaning sentiments, I'm not looking for helpful tidbits on how to get them to sleep or enjoy this mombie ((mom + zombie)) time of your life, you will miss it--blah, blah, blah. I'm in the trenches--NOT what I need to hear right now!)
I don't know what part of me needs this recognition from others or to be good at something. Ahem, probably the sinful part. When I was a teacher, I felt successful often or at least like I had a point to all my runnings around. I could make lists and check things off. And snap pictures for instagram of things that turned out so wonderfully and that I even had time to arrange them for snazzy photo ops.
As a homemaker, I can make lists and check things off and feel productive...maybe even successful in that role. But my other job as a mom is a little harder to make into a list and check things off. I think that is why I struggle with feeling successful.
And how would I even define success with my kids is probably a bigger question. Is it when they get older and have real jobs, and I can not be embarrassed when other people ask what my children are doing?? Is it when they get a scholarship for being intelligent or playing a sport really well?? Gosh, I guess the big thing for me is that I want my girls to love the Lord and serve Him. (And I say that like gosh, I just realized that as typing not gosh, duh, doesn't every one??)
In that same context, that's where I should feel successful in loving the Lord and serving Him. That means tangibly loving people and that's hard because people are dumb. (See, I need some work in that area!) I am serving the Lord in my home right now raising these girls. And most days on more than one occasion I say dirty words in my head and I want to stab my eyes out and Real Housewives of some city is on while my children are in the room because I just need a break. (Anyone, anyone else?? Crickets chirping... Crawls under rock.)
Point being, because I am severely digressing, all jobs don't make you famous, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't be doing them.
Also, question for you: how did you find out what your spiritual gift is? I want to start actively using mine and being aware of it, but don't really know how to go about that...
Keeping it rrreal, ladies,